Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize