i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Randomize
