I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
