So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
