it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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