Yo dont text me then not text me
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I haven't been this sober since birth.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
