I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Apparently when you start crushing adderall and blending them into your margaritas calling them blenderalls you have "a problem" WTF
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