Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
