So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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