His stupid grin looks like he's mid-ejaculation
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
She said I had a really great aura. Which I think is hippie code for "I bet you can give me a mind melting orgasm"
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
