Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
