at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Is it weird that I Facebook creep hot people from their credit card receipts?
Being single for so long makes me fucking creepy.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
