dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
It's a sit down to pee kind of hangover
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Randomize
