I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
My gyno overestimated by 3 TIMES the amount of sex we have per week. First of all, he must think I'm a freak. Secondly, I think we should catch up.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Naked. naked and bneed help.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I FOUND THE LEGS
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize
