i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
Randomize
