dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Randomize
