Whatcha textin bout Willis?
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
im sober
you just pulled your sweatpants out of your bag and thanked them for being alive
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
