Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I just slapped myself in the face with my dildo and I know that's a weird thing to share but I just had to tell to someone omg I'm laughing so hard
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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