Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Randomize
