A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
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