A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
The uberlube is also flammable
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
Randomize
