Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
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