honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
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