Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
Randomize
