I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
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