lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
