I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Randomize
