4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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