not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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