Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(703): View more from Virginia

maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.

(859): View more from Kentucky

i did. i'm using it as a microphone.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?

(1-617): View more from Massachusetts

Yes but- 100% agreed

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(336): View more from North Carolina

They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.

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(310): View more from California

He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit

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(512): View more from Texas

She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!

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(651): View more from Minnesota

mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."

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(270): View more from Kentucky

I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.

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