Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize