Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize
