: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Is there a card that says "Sorry I got drunk at your Christmas party and tried to steal your monogrammed hand towels so that I could give you something nice for Christmas"?
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
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