once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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