Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize
