I think I died a long time ago.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Hippo gnu deer
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
