The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
