I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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