Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
I thought he was being really sweet and protective when he pulled me away from the guy i was hooking up with, but turns out he just wanted me to get chicken nuggets with him...
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
