that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
i can't believe i had my finger in that
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
So you think it's my fault? I didn't give you the 10 shots you took nor make you eat the brownies we made... btw, i found your engagement ring, it was in the last brownie you wouldn't let me have while dragging me to my room.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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