There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
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