what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
