Nicole vs. Life
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
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