There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
no you cant smoke seaweed
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
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