oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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