Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
I would ride that face into the sunset
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
Randomize
