If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
this hospital has no fireball
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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