Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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