No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Randomize
