Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Pants on the Ground is the theme song of my life
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize