Betty ford says i'm here all night
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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