I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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